Are you living your life by simply going through the motions? Taking it day by day, step by step and minute by minute? Or maybe you’re caught constantly dreaming about the future, or worried about the past to the point where you’re completely disconnected from where you are right now? Whatever state you’re in, I can relate.
I spent a good part of my life going through the motions waiting for my moment to come. Pushing aside the big feelings and numbing out as best I could. I would show up, do what I had to do and then retreat back to my hole the moment I saw my opportunity. But being wildly disconnected from my life left me feeling incredibly empty, lacking and utterly unfulfilled.
I have no doubt that this is hitting home for at least a few of you out there.
I wasn’t sure what I wanted in life because I was never allowing myself to be fully present or to process some of the wild and equally wonderful things that had happened to me, nor was I processing how I was feeling in my day to day activities. With no connection I had zero feedback as to what fit for me, and what might have been way off base. This girl was coasting and on the verge of going down.
So what changed?
We’ll if you’ve followed me for awhile you know there was a big self-love awakening and a whole lotta WERK *snap snap*. That being said those changes never would have taken place if I hadn’t started at the core, with reflecting on my life. My self-awareness revelation started innocent enough. I had a journal, a pen and a whole lot of things that desperately needed to come out, and so I let them. Journalling had been something I used for a good chunk of my teen years, but I had always used it as an outlet to contain all of my frustration, disappointment and anger. I never really took the time or opportunity to reflect or take ownership for my role in all the discomfort I had been repeatedly choosing to experience. So I adjusted my writing style and I started to use it as an opportunity to ask myself the tough questions, to unravel the mystery that was my life.
Instead of simply venting about how So and So pissed me off, or What’s his face was a dick to me, I started to ask myself what was beneath my experience. What at the core was triggering me and what patterns could I uncover in my life. I started to realize that I was feeding into so many of my insecurities by the people I chose to associate with, the parities I went to, the jobs I chose and the everyday BS I allowed in my space. I started to recognize that I was if anything the root of all of my strife. I was choosing everything that was completely out of alignment with who I was uncovering beneath all the mess, and every single one of my values. I took charge by becoming the number 1 detective in my life, and things got really clear incredibly quickly.
So how do you get started?
Get yourself a nice journal that’s easily portable and feels great to write in. Something that fits in a purse or bag so you can take it on the go.
Set aside time each day either in the morning or in the evening to reflect and write about your most recent experiences. As you write ask questions like “How did that make me feel” “What was it that had me react so strongly or feel so hurt” “Am I truly enjoying this or am I doing it for someone or something else”. As you start to ask yourself meaningful questions about what you do or experience in the run of a day you can begin to connect to what lands and feels good in your life, and maybe some of the things that you’re simply doing out of habit or false obligation. As you build that foundational awareness through your writing and build the practice of checking in you can easily start to reorganize and reprioritize your life in a way that feels more harmonious and true to you. As we deepen our self-awareness we gain control over our lives, and that my friends is one of the more freeing and empowering feelings that you will ever experience.
From awareness we can make the changes that will set us on a course to live our most fulfilled and aligned life yet. This is my hope for myself and for each of you.
So go ahead, tuck in and become your greatest detective. Step out of the space of disconnected living and start moving from a place of self-awakening. You my friend have got this!